Round 1

08 Apr 2024 - 21 Apr 2024

Round 1 of season 6 is complete, with (almost) all matches played, so let's take a look at where things stand...

Starting with the Rookie division, several teams have set their stalls out early with big scores right from the off. Top of the table are the Bright Jugglers, who sailed past the goblins of Chainsaw Buffet almost like they weren't on the pitch at all (and to be fair, many of them weren't by the end of the match). Small consolation for lineman Ludger Wirths, carried off the astrogranite with a career-ending injury.

Right on their heels, the Grave Rubbers had no trouble seeing off I Balabiòtt, who seem rather less foul-hungry than their coach's previous team, while the Yorkshire Nobs and the Badlands Da'Baytin Sossayetty both also notched up crucial early wins.

Mid-table, the Zharr-Naggrund Prophets will be kicking themselves not to have managed to score against the all-zombie lineup of Grave Danger, while the Stink 11s may be relieved to have escaped with only one player sent to appease the Blood God's neverending need for fresh skulls for His throne.

Round 2 sees the Dark Delvers join the fray while the Immortulz Old Boyz take a break and hope they don't forget what they're supposed to be doing.

Over in the Veteran division, once all the agency fees and admin bribes have been paid the teams are looking pretty closely matched. The one win of the round went to the Buffalo Biles, who showed their claws in the most literal way to remove the Jungle Rumble kroxigor before he'd even noticed the match had started. The Rumble fought hard with a reduced team, but to no avail.

Fans of spectacle will have been thrilled by the match between Waldhof Middenheim and the Pink Panthers, whether they were looking for touchdowns or death. Middenheim's classic pairing of Colenbrander and de Kort looked to have the game in the bag, but the ladies of the Panthers can never be discounted and squeaked in a last minute equaliser in the dying seconds of the game.

The Badlands Bruisaz, meanwhile, did what orcs do and beat the Talabecland Thunder to a bloody pulp before remembering to score a touchdown to make the game a draw.

Round 2 sees the Biles looking to cement their spot at the top of the table when they take on the Thunder, while Middenheim take solace in knowing that having all their surviving blitzers in the hospital for the next match means none of them can die to the oversized fists of the Bruisaz, and Huanchi's Jungle Rumble hope to contain the Panthers and get themselves in the running.

Round 2 runs until 5th May. Good luck, everyone!