Round 2

07 Jul 2025 - 20 Jul 2025

It's what everyone has been waiting for. No, not a new edition of Blood Bowl, but the Round Two Roundup! Let's take a look at all the action as the divisions start to open up...

Division 1 opened with a clash between the Nevermore Ravens and the Blitzen Bozos. The dwarves have built a strong team and they showed their power right out of the gates, removing a thrall with a single powerful punch that will leave him out of action for the next round as well. The vampires responded with anger, taking a troll slayer out almost immediately and following up later with an injury to a runner that will likely always bother them in cold weather. The dwarves took the lead just before halftime, but a strategic timeout gave the Ravens just enough time to equalise before the whistle. The violence continued in the second half, some of self-inflicted as the vampires showed their usual dedication to hurting their own linemen, but the dwarves lost their other troll slayer and had a blitzer taken off in a body bag. Despite this, the Bozos put up an admirable show and though the vamps took the lead they managed to hold firm and snatch a draw.

It was elf vs elf as the Cordelian Dolphins took on their lower cousins, the Felwithen Furies. The Dolphins were perhaps expecting a refined match, and seemed surprised when the Furies came out fighting. The high elf offence was quite literally stunned, leaving the Furies free to steal the ball and take the lead. There was more misery for the Dolphins in the second half as the Furies continued to hurt them while playing keep away with the ball, only scoring a second right at the end of the half to ensure their victory.

The promised game between the Saratcens and Romero's Regenerates never came to fruition. Perhaps the rats saw the level of violence on show elsewhere, perhaps they sized up the strength of their opposition, but either way they suddenly remembered a pressing appointment on the other side of the country and sent their apologies as they simply couldn't make it to the stadium on time. The win was awarded to the Regenerates by default, but the skaven live to play another day.

That leaves three teams currently tied for the top spot, with the Furies ranked above the Bozos and the Regenerates on the strength of their record. With the Ravens just two points behind in fourth, the title race is still wide open. Next round sees the Furies aiming to gain a lead over the Regenerates, the Saratcens facing the Ravens, and the tattered remnants of the Bozos looking to get their groove back against the Dolphins.

In Division 2, the Gnawthorn Vermin were looking rather battered before they even lined up against the Sokol Serpents, but they drafted in some temp players and paid for a couple of stars to try to even the odds. It came to very little, however, as the Serpents proceeded to break every player they could get their hands on while the skinks ran in touchdown after touchdown. The skaven can take some consolation in the fact that most of the injuries they received weren't permanent, but though Hakflem Skuttlespike grabbed a touchdown at the last minute the final 4-1 scoreline will be tough for Vermin fans to swallow. We can only hope that having more of their players back for the next game will help them turn their fortunes around.

Next up, a controversial matchup between the might of the Blåhaj Blasts and the relatively inexperienced Tinseltown Terrors. With the Blasts having finely honed their team into a high-speed meat grinder, there are rumblings that it may be unfair to expect any team to take them on. That said, the Terrors worked hard on the pitch and gave as good as they got, though taking out linemen still left the worst of the killers active on the pitch. It took until the second half for the Blasts to remember they were supposed to be doing things with the ball, but eventually they got themselves together and scored two touchdowns for the win.

Another match failed to make it to the pitch as the Forked Tongues and the Talabecland Thunder found themselves hampered by other commitments. No word emerged on who had contrived to make both teams think the other couldn't make it, but in the end nobody showed up and the game was awarded as a draw.

The Serpents hold the top thanks to their goal difference giving them the edge over the Blasts, but the Forked Tongues are sitting just behind them and biting their tails. Next round sees the Vermin looking to improve their season against the Thunder, the Forked Tongues being the latest to get fed to the Blasts, and the valiant Terrors face another hard match against the Serpents.

Down in Division 3, the Knickerbocker Glory Slobberknockers brought their special brand of snotling chaos to their match against Norsey But Nice. The snots always seem on paper to be extremely breakable, but on astrogranite they are extremely resilient little buggers, and with trolls and pump wagons on the pitch it was the Norse who took the worse beating. There will be a lot of deep heat needed by the team going forward, but despite the pain they took the game 2-0.

There was a sea of green in the stadium as the Burning Sensations took on fellow orc team Orc City. It was a remarkably civilised match, especially when compared to the others this round. Rather than hurt each other, the two teams played nice and scored a touchdown apiece, though towards the end Orc City forgot their agreement and executed a particularly crunching tackle against an opposing Big Un.

The third orc team, Da Bushwakkaz, then showed up to play the Anfield Anarchists and there was no such friendly agreement in evidence here. Sadly for the orcs, it was the humans who showed up more than ready to fight. Maybe Da Bushwakkaz forgot their armour, maybe the Anarchists had a little something extra tucked in their gloves, but the orcs saw three of their players not just injured but killed. Goblin deaths may be considered normal, but to lose two Big Uns in that way smacks of carelessness. Despite that, the remaining shreds of Da Bushwakkaz put up a valiant defence and held the humans to a single touchdown.

Last up in the division, the Midnight Massives took on the Green-Orange Golds. The nobles showed an extraordinary ability to knock their opponents unconscious, clearing opponents off the pitch with ease, and for a long time it seemed like the match was theirs as the Massives struggled to focus against such force. But somewhere midway through the second half the horrors pulled themselves together and started fighting back, injuring several players and even killing a bodyguard, and they scored at the last minute for a 1-1 draw.

Norsey But Nice take the top spot, tied on points with the Anfield Anarchists. The rest of the table is extremely close, and even the snotlings could still race up with a good following wind. Next round sees Norsey But Nice taking on the beleaguered Bushwakkaz, the Anarchists hoping to kill more orcs in the shape of the Burning Sensations, the Midnight Massives stepping on the Knickerbocker Glory Slobberknockers and Orc City face the Green-Orange Golds.

Down in Division 4, the action started with a match between Chainsaw Buffet and the Naggarond Blitzers. The goblins brought their usual brand of chaos, wielding illegal weapons, sticking the boot in wherever they could reach, and occasionally injuring themselves just for funsies. Meanwhile the dark elves got on with the business of actually playing the game, taking the match 3-1.

It was a rainy day when the Gornagechu Suckers hosted the Scunbag Gitz. The cloud cover was a boon to the vampires, and the lightweight armour of the thralls was a blessing for the black orcs. The Gitz entertained themselves injuring their opponents and completely ignored the slick, rain-covered ball, while the Suckers resisted falling apart with their dwindling numbers and scored twice.

More elf-on-elf action as the Aloha Rippers faced the Moriquendi Krakens. The dark elves opted not to bring any violence to the pitch, opting to leave their rural cousins alone and just run past them, scoring three times before finally taking pity on the Rippers and letting them get one back.

Last but by no means least, the Cold Blooded Cannoneers took on Block, Glock 'n' Roll. The lizards took an early lead with a swift touchdown, and followed it up with a second before half time. The renegades were left on the back foot, caught out by powerful blocks from the sauruses (and one good punch from a skink that took out their goblin), and though a couple of skinks were injured in exchanpge there was nothing they could do to get back in the game before the end of the match.

The Krakens are at the top as the only team with two wins to their name, but the Cannoneers and the Suckers are both close behind. Next round sees the Naggarond Blitzers taking on the Cannoneers, the Aloha Rippers hoping to beat Block, Glock 'n' Roll, Chainsaw Buffet offering themselves as snacks to Gorgnagechu Suckers and the Moriquendi Krakens hosting the Scunbag Gitz.

That's Round Two all wrapped up. Round Three runs until 3rd August, so it's time to dig in and fight. A good result for any team could still turn their fortunes around, so there's everything to play for. Good luck, and may Nuffle be kind to you!