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Round 8

15 Jul 2024 - 28 Jul 2024

Let's take a look at all the action from Round Eight, brought to you today by Treemu, the low cost marketplace. Whether you're looking for clothes with witty slogans or cheap Gnomish gadgetry, Treemu will deliver direct from the forests of the East to save you money. Treemu: Shop like a Halfling! We'll start today with a look at the Veterans...

The Pink Panthers kicked off the round against the Badlandz Bruisaz, with both teams fighting for the coveted second place spot and the last chance to stay in contention for the top. The Orcs might have been expected to fight fiercely, but in fact it was the Amazons who came out hard and scored a couple of big hits in the first half, killing a blitzer and ensuring a Big 'Un will walk with a limp going forward. A third casualty in the second half sealed the game for the ladies, though the greenskinz may take solace in a late murder of a linewoman.

The Talabecland Thunder started fast with an early touchdown against Huanchi's Jungle Rumble, but sadly for their fans the game swiftly tipped away from them. The lizards retaliated immediately with a vicious block against the nobles' thrower, and the second half saw both the ogre and the star blitzer taken off the pitch and unlikely to be fit for the next match. With the resistance removed, the Rumble showed off their speed and took the game 3-1.

Finally, the beleaguered Waldhof Middenheim took on the Buffalo Biles in the midst of an absolute downpour. The Biles showed why they are at the top of the table by removing a Middenheim blitzer moments after the kickoff and scoring their usual slow touchdown right before the half-time whistle, but the underdogs refused to be counted out. Sterling work from Colenbrander and the other blitzers saw the humans equalise midway through the second half, and a deep kick and a sturdy defence put a lot of pressure on the Biles as they tried to get the win. A last-ditch power play from juggernaut Wexler left McCringleberry unable to reach the end zone in time, and with no other options the Goat was forced to attempt to give the ball to a rotter as the only player with a chance of still making it. The rain and the rotter's sweaty, pus-drenched fingers made it an unlikely play, but Nuffle loves a long shot and the rotter carried the ball across the line in the dying seconds to dash Middenheim's hopes of a draw.

So the Biles remain clear at the top, and victory over the Bruisaz in the next round would see them seal the championship. Nothing is certain, however, especially with the Bruisaz currently the only team to have beaten the Biles this season. Papa Nurgle will be looking for revenge, but the Bruisaz will still be hoping to steal the silver medal. The Panthers face an underpowered Thunder in their chase for the top, and the Rumble battle Middenheim and hope to overtake the Bruisaz in the middle of the table.

The Rookie division kicked off with a mid-table bout between the Jorvik Vikings and Kry Havoc, and a lower-ranking clash between I Balabiòtt and the Dark Delvers. Both games were extremely one-sided, with the Norse taking the worst of it in both cases. The drunkards of I Balabiòtt can at least take solace in only seeing one player hurt badly enough to miss the next match, and getting a small amount of revenge by injuring the Delvers' assassin, but the 2-0 defeats for both teams will be hard to swallow.

Violence from followers of Khorne may be expected, but violence from the Bright Jugglers in their clash against the Immortulz Ol Boyz was less predictable. The Jugglers seemed to take real pleasure in smashing goblins, with even a catcher notching up a casualty, and they romped to an easy 3-1 victory.

There were yet more broken goblins as Chainsaw Buffet faced the intellectual arguments of the Badlands Da'Baytin Sossayetty and had little to offer in the way of rebuttal. But despite suffering on the aggression front the little guys nevertheless kept things interesting on the scoring front, with their doom diver soaring majestically into the end zone twice to prevent a complete whitewash.

Finally, the White Mice took on Grave Danger and the zombies once again showed why they should never be counted out. The rats edged the win but it was a costly game for them with several players out for the next round including star gutter runner Vanilla Mice and kicker Miceal Fassbender.

So the White Mice keep the top spot, but with only one point in it and key players on bed rest, they may struggle to hold it as they face the Immortulz Ol Boyz next time. Grave Danger are taking time off to welcome their newest player with a series of humiliation initiation rituals, and the Grave Rubbers return from their break with a match against the Badlands Da'Baytin Sossayetty. The Bright Jugglers will hope to reclaim first position by taking on the Dark Delvers, and it's chaos all round as the Sokol Slaughterers face the Zharr-Naggrund Prophets. In the middle of the table, Kry Havoc aim to murder Chainsaw Buffet, the Yorkshire Nobs are away at I Balabiòtt, and the Stink 11s host the Jorvik Vikings. With several teams still in contention for the title these last few rounds could prove crucial.

Round Nine runs until 11th August, and these games could prove decisive. Settle in for big action, and maybe pick up an Orkshire t-shirt with only a few misspellings for a discount price from Treemu!